Sometimes, when a film is delayed a half-dozen times, maybe it should stay dead and buried…

“The Flash” follows the titular hero (played by Ezra Miller) as he sets out to go back in time in order to stop the murder of his mother, only to accidently enter a different universe and encounter his past self. Michael Keaton reprises his iconic role as Batman from Tim Burton’s duology, while Sasha Calle, Michael Shannon, Ron Livingston, Maribel Verdú, Kiersey Clemons, and Ben Affleck also star; Andy Muschietti directs.

I have been looking forward to this film ever since it was announced with Phil Lord and Christopher Miller writing and possibly directing it back in 2015 (the two have since worked on a different superhero multiverse film, “Across the Spider-Verse,” so I think they’re doing ok). It then went through several different directors and screenwriters, including Rick Famuyiwa and the duo of John Francis Daley and Jonathan Goldstein (who did work on the final script and received story credit), and was pushed back several times from an original July 2022 date to finish work on the visual effects. I’m not sure all those delays were really necessary, as the finished product doesn’t look finished at all and a messy script and aimless direction would always linger in what is a weak swansong for the current version of the DCEU.

Ezra Miller has had a lot of bad press in recent years, but I try my best to separate the art from the artist so I won’t get into that here; you’re more than entitled to feel how you do about the actor. As the Flash, I’ve mostly liked Miller and think they are witty and amusing. Certainly annoying at times, but I think that’s in-part because of what is being asked of them to do with the character. Here, they play both a young, immature Barry Allen and a more seasoned one, and I think the dichotomy works. They play well off themself (playing two roles at once, and the body doubles and face-masking is pretty well done) and handle the emotional scenes with surprising restraint. However, if you watched any of the “Justice League” films and found Miller grating, they won’t get any more palatable here.

The rest of the cast is solid too, with Keaton clearly enjoying reprising the role that launched him into superstardom (though there really isn’t too much for him to do here and he receives nearly no character development). The real star is the addition of Sasha Calle as Supergirl, the alternate universe’s version of Henry Cavill’s Superman. Calle has a good screen presence and I enjoyed her in the action scenes, and whether she is in James Gunn’s plans for the new slate of DC films or not, I look forward to seeing her in other projects in the future. It’s also nice to see Ben Affleck as Bruce Wayne one last time. He’s probably my favorite rendition of the character and he has a nice moment with Miller that acts as his goodbye to the role after several films.

I’m pretty mixed on the new multiverse trend. On one hand, it can be used as clever fan service or layered storytelling like in the “Spider-Verse” films and even “Doctor Strange 2” (shush, that film is fun). However it has also been weaponized by studios to bait audiences with nostalgia, and “The Flash” leans more into that second group. There are a handful of fun cameos here but also some really uncanny ones (I can’t say why or who without spoiling things, but they just feel forced), and I think that we need to move on from this trend. This film explains the alternate timeline theory weaker than “Avengers: Endgame” and is less detailed than “Into the Spider-Verse,” so people who don’t care much about comic book lore may be left out in the cold wondering why and how things are happening.

The plot is alright, with some well-done scenes with Barry and his mom and some bits about the multiverse and ramifications of time travel that save the film from being a total disaster. However the direction by Andy Muschietti is either all over the place or nowhere to be found, and by the time the (never-ending) climax arrives you are baffled when it just.. keeps… going.

OK, now let’s get to the elephant in the room, the visual effects. Like I said, the film was delayed by nearly a year because Warner Bros. needed more time to work on the CGI, but it hardly shows. We have (justly) criticized Marvel in recent years for their over-emphasis on green screens and undercooked visual effects, and it is in-part due to under-funded and over-worked VFX workshops. However at least with Marvel the issue is that the effects look bland or flat; here, they are distractingly awful. I’m talking uncanny valley, PlayStation 2 cutscene bad. Right from the jump, there are CGI babies being placed into animated microwaves in slow-motion and it only goes downhill from there. I cannot overstate how awful some of the effects are here, possibly the worst of any modern blockbuster, and it honestly makes me anxious and angry for the future of big budget movies. I have no (inherent) problem with a “Transformers” film that is CGI creatures fighting CGI creatures; I do have problems with CGI humans fighting CGI humans.

I’m sure there are some people who will like this film, and I’m happy for them. There will be an equal amount of folk who despise it, and I cannot argue that opinion, either. For me, one fun cameo and a well-handled emotional scene at the end saved this from being deemed “bad,” but only just. As far as the DCEU goes, “The Flash” falls somewhere in the middle of the pack (which is more a condemnation on the franchise than it is any sort of real comment on this film), and it sends the 10-year-old shared universe out on a whimper.

Critics Rating: 5/10